The Word of God
Never Really Alone
“But the souls of the just are in the hand of God, and no torment shall touch them. They seemed, in the view of the foolish, to be dead; and their passing away was thought an affliction and their going forth from us, utter destruction. But they are in peace.” Wisdom 3:1
The loneliness was so intense it was simultaneously choking her very ability to breathe while removing all the colors from the world she once loved to greet every time she stepped into her universe. Her young husband’s funeral was nice if such a word could be used to describe that kind of experience, and everyone seemed so helpful and supportive, but it was just overwhelming to face the awful truth that he was gone. In painful hindsight at the very raw and present moment, perhaps they should have adopted children, since they were unable to have their own, but just their ongoing discussions about that possibility seemed to bring them closer and closer together even up to that fateful afternoon in the doctor’s office when they heard that vicious and mind-drilling word together. Cancer.
It was more than aggressive and the only optimistic vantage point they could muster was that he was not going to last very long with all the obvious and expected treatments out of the question. And they were right, the specialists that is, with their kind but seemingly detached manner. “It’ll be important to keep him comfortable,” she kept playing over and over in her mind like a distant, wistful echo that sounded like a lost dog never to be recovered by its owners.
People were very good to her, mostly at the beginning. She loved their visits and the soothing tones of consolation in their voices but everyone has lives to live and after a handful of weeks, they slowly got back to those routines leaving her to deal with this burden the best she knew how. Her doctors wanted to prescribe anti-depression medication and while she may or may not have been entirely averse to the idea, she was getting very tired of the looks of pity and endless droopy eyes that seemed to be softly saying, “poor girl.” She had lived a full and great life, by all acceptable standards all the way around and perhaps that was part of the problem, that it had been without major issues or crises. Everything always seemed to fall into place except this new season of lost meaning.
Then, after the longest month she could remember, the anger began to set a hold on her heart and nothing was going to relieve this new darkness that previously escaped her personality and approach to life. Why wasn’t anyone else upset? Don’t they know how horrible this is? She just wanted to scream, and, on some occasions, she would, as long as she could into the dusty pillow that still retained faint aromas of his cologne.
“On this mountain, the LORD of hosts will provide for all peoples. On this mountain he will destroy the veil that veils all peoples, the web that is woven over all nations; he will destroy death forever. The Lord GOD will wipe away the tears from all faces.” Isaiah 25:6
She never fancied herself as the kind of person who would go to the cemetery thinking that it was reserved for a much older, perhaps even wiser generation that must have known something that she did not. At first, she was going every morning, “such a long and empty trip,” she used to think and then they became less and less with even more anger and resentment building in her because according to her, no one cared that her entire life had been torn asunder and she was the only one who remembered. “What a miserable existence!,” she would think while catching herself agreeing with that nihilistic delusional teacher she once knew way back who believed that everyone loved life and hated death because, in his words, “life was a beautiful lie and death a painful truth.”
She would laugh to herself when she remembered her favorite comedian Robin Williams, who once said on The Johnny Carson Show that death was nature’s way of saying that “your table is ready.” Then there were twilight moments when after a nice cup of cinnamon tea, she would stare out into space with a blank look and a hint of a smile as she remembered their last vacation in London together. With tears still in her eyes, she would reflectively pause, thinking about an incident after dinner one night after they ran across a quote painted on a wall near Trafalgar Square which said something like “They say you die twice. One time when you stop breathing and a second time, a bit later on, when somebody says your name for the last time.”
She had just crossed that bridge when depression turns to anger, then to denial and then back to depression again, with intermittent stops at self-pity and harsh, biting comments along the way. She was alone, she was always going to be alone, and no one, not even her closest friends who heard her cries for attention and meaning and comfort, seemingly did not even give it a second thought. Didn’t they love him? Don’t they care? How could they even laugh out loud, even at a good joke!?
Time began to slow at a death march pace and she was becoming sick and tired of being sick and tired. Her mind would drift in and out of happy memories coupled with the recollections of those last hours in hospice. “It must be true,” she thought. “We are born alone, we live alone, we die alone.” “At least, that’s how it feels,” she would mumble while wondering if she was going crazy talking to herself.
“Hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us. For Christ, while we were still helpless, yet died at the appointed time for the ungodly.” Romans 5:1
Then completely without warning came that night, which may have been the last time she would ever lose a total sleep cycle under the moonlight wide awake as if she was in a theater with the anguish of emptiness sitting upon her chest like an elephant. She would push herself to shower, get dressed, and make the first few minutes of the dawn her stage for a dutiful sad cemetery visit. She would make his favorite french toast sandwich, wrapping it in a soft blue napkin that had been left over from a birthday party or something with the childlike hope that maybe a rabbit or squirrel would have it for lunch rather than be the meal and just leave it there. Her plan was brilliant and actually made her feel useful for a change as she turned down the flame from the stovetop and began to slowly wrap her breakfast creation. “Wow, this smells pretty good. I bet he’d like this,” she thought as she caught herself tearing up but then making haste to get to the car and drive those increasingly familiar miles to his grave.
The new day could not have been more than thirty minutes old and by the time she arrived, there was a fine, moist dew that spread across the beautifully manicured areas. “How silent, how picturesque, and yet how so horribly sad,” she thought. She was sure she was alone although there was a feeling as if someone else was there but she quickly dismissed the idea lest she begin to think the worst about the silent occupants of the graveyard. She retrieved her breakfast delight whose aroma had already filled her small sedan and heroically prepared herself for this visit while she could sense a blanket of peace and real acceptance finally and gently folding over her soul. The soft subtle colors of pre-dawn made everything so kind to her as if to warmly welcome her to a new life. It was then that she noticed a distinct other set of footprints in the dew-covered grass actually leading to and from the area where her husband was buried. Before unleashing her imagination, she spotted his temporary marker of a tombstone with something dangling from it. It was a sign with a flower attached. She read it deliberately but very gently and smiled.
“I miss him, too.”
“Look at the sky. We are not alone. The whole universe is friendly to us and conspires only to give the best to those who dream and work.” Abdul Kalam
True loneliness cannot exist as long as there is just one person left who can sift through the dark tears of emptiness and unveil the world for what it truly is, a place of hope and adventure, an ongoing novel with beginnings and endings in perpetual motion. It is like a colorful, vintage carousel that keeps revolving and turning, revealing with each rotational pass different creatures, colors, and music until, at the very end of a full and wonderful orbit of life, all the characters, and riders, and songs leave the trappings of time and make their way into the starlit sky of eternity like Elijah’s chariot of fire or the quintessential Christmas sleigh led by eight (or nine) lovely reindeer.
We don’t need to fear death because we don’t have to live forever. We just have to live.
Share your thoughts (36 thoughts)Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You have faith in God; have faith also in me. In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places. If there were not, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back again and take you to myself, so that where I am you also may be. Where I am going you know the way.” John 14:1-4
Caro,
i think i know why you wanted me to read this. i thank you so much. i know it seems obvious how one looks upon loneliness, but it seems only human, natural feelings. We don’t look upon the real reason why things happen. it’s all God’s plan. though people don’t realize it because life isn’t going their way or something tragic happens suddenly, none of us know the reason for all this, but some people do. I try my best to appreciate what I do have instead of what I don’t. I know everything happens for a reason. And i thank you for writing this inspirational article. keep it going. thanks.
That was quite beautiful and honest. Thank you for sharing with so many what we all must carry to get to the Promised Land of Hope and Salvation! “Being heard is so close to being loved, that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.”
Years ago when I worked at our Parish, I was routinely asked as part of my duties to be a lector for funerals during the week. So many of the beautiful Scripture passages you referenced in this story were the readings I remember so well. I tried to sincerely convey the meaning of the words being proclaimed to the families who were grieving because I wanted them to have hope in their despair. I’m thankful for those days. I truly believe they prepared me for my Dad’s death.
When I remember my Dad, I always go back to the last conversation I had with him where he seemed to actually connect with me. He suffered with Alzheimer’s for 10 years. He couldn’t put sentences together anymore, so he seldom tried. He just listened to me and “spoke” with his eyes and his smile. As I held his hand, I told him I loved him and was so proud to be his daughter; thankful that he showed me how to work hard, to appreciate family, to have fun, to laugh, to dance and especially how to forgive. He showed me he understood as he kissed my hand.
At Mass, I am comforted knowing my Dad is very hopefully right there with me, through the veil of time.
It took me a few days to comment on your beautifully told story because it caused me to reminisce about those difficult times. It also brought to mind how much I sought our Good Lord for consolation and how He carried me and my family to His Peace.
Thank you for sharing this story! My favorite two lines were these…We don’t need to fear death because we don’t have to live forever. We just have to live.❤️
Thank you so very much, Mary Ann for these wonderful comforting words that I know will assist others in their journey along this great road of life. So many others have sent messages of the same as you related them here today. What moved me most was how through just one kiss on the hand you could interpret and receive the gratitude for the lessons of “how to work hard, to appreciate family, to have fun, to laugh, to dance and especially how to forgive.” This was a brilliant reflection and we are very grateful for the time you took to construct and offer it to us.
Oh my goodness this hit me in the right place.
Anyone who has lost a person they loved can associate with these feelings. For me, it was my dad, two years ago April. The first real intimate death I have experienced. It was sudden and knocked the life out of me. As I read this I felt everyone of that women’s emotions.
I still cry, I still feel the pain and the loss.
Brother, welcome, and please receive our gratitude for your comments and the sharing of your deep thoughts and memories that bring us all to remember all of ours. Thank you for allowing us to grieve with you and by spiritual extension, to rejoice with you with the promise of a life that is not ended, but changed. Please allow me, a lover of all things musical, to quote Irving Berlin, who also wrote “Rhapsody in Blue,” who brilliantly said, “The song is ended, but the melody lingers on.” Thank you so very much. We both know that the best is yet to come.
Caro Vanni, you so beautifully describe the authentic journey of so many people who have to endure that reality we call grief! 35 years as a priest, I walk that journey with many people and some very close friends. You were describing their lives and I think one of the deepest joys of loving many parishioners and knowing many people Is that I too can say with many of them, “I miss him, too.” At that time the isolation gives away to healing connection. Call Rogers says that the facts are friendly. You laid out the facts so beautifully that so many people go through. As they feel deal and heal we walk with them and we join them saying, “I miss him, too.”
Thank you for your healing words that will hopefully bring many people out of isolation and connect them again to the source of love who is God!”
Father David, welcome back! During these very busy times for you, we all so appreciate the time and effort you have taken to spend some time with us here in “Agapeland.”! First and foremost, on behalf of the entire Foundation community and all our Bible recipients, especially the 500+ who are currently in remote Bible studies across the country, please accept our heartfelt congratulations on 35 wonderful years of Priestly service and ministry. God only knows how many souls you have touched through your consecrated hands through the confection of the Eucharist, those who have been blessed to hear your music and those healed and strengthened by your magnificent homilies. You join with us with the deepest hope to help “bring many people out of isolation and connect them again to the source of love who is God!” Ad multos annos! (May you live many and glorious years!)
Wonderfully written article. We grieve for our losses but in our hearts it’s all in God’s master plan. I’ve always tried to believe that everything happens for the best even if we can’t see it at the time. It’s not on our timeline it’s always on God’s timeline. Through the loss of my mother and a young son six weeks apart I never really felt alone just missed them but was happy they were together and not suffering. Your articles are so heart warming and uplifting please keep sharing them with us, they are such a comfort.
We are all so grateful that you have shared your path of grief so deep and so tender especially with the seemingly overwhelming cross of losing your mother and son in such a short span of time. Jesus was and is clearly close to your heart. The mystery of love and grief and faith is that he does not keep our hearts from breaking but he’s right there when it does to have his tears mingle with ours. Thank you for your encouragement and willingness to respond and add your thoughts and feelings to those who not only add their comments but also who read and silently and valiantly carry their Cross daily. What a great reunion it will be someday in Paradise. Until then, thank you for all your witness filled with a mother’s love.
As a mental health therapist I’ve had the privilege of companioning many people in their grief. It’s a remarkably intimate human experience that reveals glimpses of our Godly connectedness to creation. In the depths of painful broken heartedness we encounter the sweetness of God’s comforting and gentle kindness. Fatherly reassurance. The paradox viscerally allows us to receive and experience grace as to almost touch the mystery of faith. “Never Really Alone” is a reminder that love never dies. That’s why when someone we love dies we don’t begin to love them less. Love only grows. Another paradoxical mystery this beautiful story illuminates is the highly personal and individual experience of grief. No two people have the exact same grief experience, yet grief itself is universally human. A poet once described grief as her loved one being constantly present and forever absent. A sentiment reflected in the story of “Never Really Alone.”
We welcome to these pages the thoughts and musings of Dr. Montez! Thank you, Tony for your time and effort and giving us your reflection on these matters, great and small. I love the phrase, “love never dies,” because, in part, it is how I wish to live my life, and secondly, and assuredly most importantly, it is how Jesus taught us to live, and breathe, and have our being. Of particular note and impression, I personally appreciated the dialectical balance that we must all befriend one way or another when you relayed the poet’s thought that grief was “being constantly present and forever absent.” Very nice. Once we make peace with diametrically opposed feelings coexisting in an ever-expanding heart, the more truth and peace will will find, than by extension, share with those we love. See you next time!
Wow!! “Never Really Alone” was a story that everyone can relate to, in their own way! My mother passed away in 2004 with cancer. It was so hard for me to let her go. I remember the Dr telling us she had 2 years to live. I also remember me telling the Dr “how dare you say that because only God knows how long she has to live!” Now I realize he was just giving his professional estimate…by the way, she lived 4 years after her diagnosis. I prayed and prayed for a miracle then 1 day I was watching a T.V. show about a minister, whose mother had passed away. He was angry at God till someone told him he was being selfish and denying his mother from heaven. I knew that message was for me. I prayed and told God that He could take her if that was His Will. That night she passed away but i was in peace. Then in 2008 when we were all by my father’s bedside, as he was leaving us, my father looked at me, I nodded my head “yes”, he smiled and passed. I know for a fact that I was not alone, and I never am. Jesus didn’t take my parents till i was ready to let them go. I live my life trusting in Jesus.
Thank you for another heart warming story! I read this one several times. Please keep them coming!
Welcome back, Julie, and thank you so very much for contributing to these pages once again with the wonderful familiar way you share your own spiritually enlightening chapters of your blessed life. Your comments definitely affect others who have very similar events and moments in their own journeys toward the Father. Your recollections of your parents’ death were moving and enlightening: one prepared you for the other. The goal of all Christians in this life is to live trusting everything and everyone to Jesus, as you so brilliantly wrote. Thank you for your encouraging words and thoughtful prayers. We will be submitting a new article very soon and will look forward to presenting it to our growing online community. We will be lifting your parents at our Agape Mass this weekend.
Great story about the process we go through and human reflections and struggles of the soul. I am moved to remember the loss of my Mom and reminded of the pain of losing her to cancer. But hope outweighs our grief when we are reminded that when death comes there is nothing we can do, but be prepared for what awaits us.
Thank you, Gabriel, for reminding us that all of life is a process with so many twists and turns all leading to a final conclusion that was won for us on the Cross of Jesus. Hope always dispels the threat and danger or despair when we link our sufferings to those of Christ and all those who mourn. Blessed are all of us who are burdened by the death of loved ones, “for we shall be comforted.” Prayers continue for your Mom.
Thank you for another amazing and moving piece of art. Reading it stirred within me myriad of emotions. It is possible thar I might not have yet properly grieved over the passing of my Mom and my sister. Or, maybe my age and of being tired of the chaotic and evil events of the world and of my private life, I think more about moving on to the other side of life to be with God and those whom we love.
Life is beautiful and breathtaking experience, sprinkled with love, goodness and beauty that make us all to want stayIng here permanently, but we/I forget that it is just a journey with many stops. Some of stops are pleasant some are dreadful, but the journey must go on.
The Scriptures you quoted are comforting to those who are “on the table” and those who grief with all its steps, and those who do not yet think about finality of this earthly life.
Physical death, as painful as it is, is another adventure of life.
Dear God help us to celebrate life here and now and there when our time comes.
Thank you again for sharing with us your talents. Looking forward for another one.
Once again you grace our pages with your kind words and deep reflective insights for all of us. I particularly liked the tension you brought to our discussion about loving a beautiful life yet longing for Heaven where there is no more chaos, evil, or those who live by these malicious swords. Grief is indeed the price we pay for loving and after it is all said and done, it will be revealed as a very small wage indeed. Pray for us as we do for you, constantly.
Goodness!! This is so powerful! I never had the privilege of really knowing my dad before he died when I was 1 year old. But I often feel that loneliness and only until I was reached out to, by my family recently, that knew him, I felt closure. Hearing stories and keeping memories alive thru them has brought my heart peace. I also felt the presence of God thru their desire to bring his name to life again in my heart. Thank you for such a beautiful story!!
I am so glad you received much from the blog post and that you could share this part of your life with our readers. Having peace in one’s heart is the greatest gift especially when we surrender the need for control and comprehension of every facet of our existence. Trust is the best avenue we can take in this crazy world and it’s grand to read that you are firmly on that path. The longer the Lord allows me to live on this planet, the more I can agree with the assertion of a poet who wrote: “when everything seems like it’s falling apart that’s when God is putting things together just the way he wants it.” Have a blessed month, Margo. God bless you always!
This…
this beautiful, heart wrenching story of life and death and living was nothing less than captivating. We all suffer the loss of a loved one, whether it be a death or even losing someone to addictions or an argument that went to far, we’ve all experienced grief. Having gone through much loss over my younger years, grief and anger have no age restrictions; it comes for you regardless, unwelcome, and unannounced.
It reminded me of when I visited my aunt and cousins who were tragically taken from us on the same day by a drugged out robber. I remained angry and sour for several years after, and after seeing other members “getting over it,” I felt so alone and even more upset. I was too hurt to visit their graves; for I did not want to accept their deaths, I didn’t want to stop being angry…
I take photos of sunsets pretty often. And one evening after school, the most beautiful sunset I had seen in a long time was painted across the sky waiting for me to capture it. (I should also note how ironic it was that I randomly happened to have my Nikon camera with me that day). Not wanting to snap any telephone poles in the shot, I followed a long road, keeping my eyes on the sunset, until the road began to curve, and the sun was beginning to set. I had to stop or I would lose it.. and where I stopped gives me chills to this day: it was the cemetery. I was just a kid when my family died and didn’t even know the name of the burial site, much less how to get there. So the sunset to me, was one hundred percent God telling me to come.. that I am ready to let go. As if I was led by the hands of their spirits, I almost immediately found their tombstones. The three of them, buried side by side. In the distance, straight ahead, were three trees, and the most perfect sunset setting right behind them. I swung around my camera, and captured the moment to remember forever.
After many prayers, tears, and talks with my aunt and cousins until the night sky fell upon us, I left the cemetery feeling as though all the anger and sadness melted off my heart. I felt surrounded by happiness and comfort unlike anything I’d experienced in the years prior.
I might add that the next morning, I flipped the most perfect omelette I’ve ever flipped. After years of anger and sorrow, I laughed so genuinely.
The part that clenched my heart so tightly was the very end when she saw that sign from the unknown person. It moved me because when I finally talked to my other cousins and uncle about the deaths (which I was scared to because I didn’t want to unearth any old wounds), it turns out they too felt alone and thought they were the only ones who visited the cemetery. We ended up reminiscing on old memories and stories of our passed loved ones over a tamale dinner and sweet tea.
This story touched my heart and soul ever so delicately, and served as a reminder that death is a part of life, and it should always be celebrated. For even in the times when you feel you are alone in this fight, God will always be by your side and lead you to a path of precious healing. All you have to do.. is listen.
Don’t ever stop writing.
Thanks for sharing,
Kristen
Brilliant and heart-moving reflection, Kristen! Thank you for sharing a significant segment of your life with all our readers and for pointing to eternity with God as our healthy and most sane point of reference. It’s important, as you wrote, that we become very good listeners to all that God has in store for us especially when we do not understand at the moment why things happen and what we are to do next. It is always good to learn something new and wonderful and that is certainly promised to us when we choose to follow the Lord and wait on his Word. I also like the tamales and sweet tea reference and maybe, just maybe, I will try to fit those images into a later post.(smiley face) Finally, thank you for your honesty and willingness to share. Your comments reminded me of that great poem by Emily Dickinson:
Because I could not stop for Death –
He kindly stopped for me –
The Carriage held but just Ourselves –
And Immortality.
Great article about going through the loss of a loved one. A priest in a homily referenced grief once said “if there is no connection there is no pain”. The loss of someone close, someone we love is painful. A time when one can relate to Jesus when from the cross he said “My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken me?” Then somewhere on the journey through grief something touches in a way that makes us realize that we were never alone… a “Footprints” moment.
Thank you so very much, Sylvia, for reminding us that grief is just another indication of our “connection” with those we love. When I read your comments, I thought of what Queen Elizabeth remarked upon the death of Princess Diana: “Grief is the price we pay for loving.” Jesus takes that message and delivers it to eternity catapulted from the cross while reminding us that our emotions are real but also passing. I loved the image of the “Footprints” reference when we finally realize that in our darkest most vulnerable moments, The Lord was right there all along. Have a blessed day!
What a wonderful story about life and death. One does not exist without the other. When losing someone you love, all the emotions within are at an all time high. People tell you things they think you want to hear when, the truth is, sometimes you just want to be alone with your emotions. You need to laugh, cry, get mad, and yell as you remember your loved one, but it’s the remembering that keeps them alive in our hearts. That and knowing that Jesus has made a place for us and has assured us we are never alone. That’s how I go about my day, knowing that whatever comes at me, good or bad, Jesus is walking right beside me giving me the strength to carry on. Very good job on the piece.
That’s exactly right, Denise, life and death are in some kind of cosmic struggle, one meaningless without the other, at least until eternity dawns. It is also so good and healthy to allow space and time for the emotions to have their say and expression. Bottled up feelings have to go somewhere and if we are not careful, they may just erupt at the most inopportune moments and venues. I love the image of Jesus walking right there with you. He doesn’t keep our hearts from breaking but when they are shattered, He’s right there weeping with us. How beautiful. Thanks so much for sharing. Blessed life in the new month ahead!
What a moving read through this article, It’s very humbling to know that he is always there for us and watching over us each day. We are never alone. Thank you again for such a beautiful read.
Thank you, Gabe, for your comments. I am glad you found meaning in the awesome fact that we are never alone no matter how intense the emotion. Have a great month ahead!
Wow, that was a very powerful article..We must continue to live..
That was my favorite line, too: We don’t have to be afraid of death. We just have to live.
This story hammers home the undeniable truth that we must live life to the fullest and treasure the short time we have on Earth with the ones who mean the most to us. The last scripture verses from John 14 should give us comfort and hope that when the inevitable happens we face another undeniable truth: there is a place for us after this life and Jesus will be there.
Greetings Ron and thank you for the time to reflect with all our readers. There is always hope because, as you faithfully wrote, there is always a place waiting for us among the Saints and Angels with Jesus forever in our midst. Perhaps grief attempts to rob us of the big picture because of the pain, but with patient endurance, we will, as St. Paul says, “save our lives.” Thanks again! Blessed day and new month ahead!
Living after a death of a loved one whether that be a best friend, spouse, or relative is hard because if this person was part of your daily life it actually feels like you are truly lonely in this world. You can’t share the special moments of the day with them or the craziness that some days have. In my opinion, especially harder with our current technology because we have their contact information saved maybe with a picture of them, their social media outlets still present, etc. It is in these moments though that we have to dig deep, deeper in our faith, deeper in our prayer life, and know that God is with us. God is with us every step of the way, we just need to take the time to stop, seek him, stay silent long enough to listen, and hear Him. Someone once told me every chapter of our book called “Life” is greater with God as the center of it. I truly believe this because even when we lose the person we were meant to love on this Earth we could get solace in knowing we can see them again, one day! Great article and very well written! Keep them coming! Blessings always!
Great article and very well written! Keep them coming! Blessings always!
Copying Veronica’ last comment as most appropriate.
Got to get back to preparing for when called to
“Supper” “Your table is ready”.
“Keep them coming!”
Many liked that line as well. When our table is ready, the best is yet to come.
Thank you so much, Veronica, for taking the time, especially as school (such that is during these times) begins with a whole new set of standards and expectations! Yes, you are absolutely correct about the feelings of loneliness when a definite point of reference in the person loved has been removed. Your wonderful advice about digging deeper is definitely spot on and the real point of the article today. Grief just as unrequited love causes us to reckon with ourselves in new and profound ways that can only make life more interesting and worth living. If it weren’t for the Resurrection of Jesus, where would be? Thank God for hope which always springs eternal. Thanks again! Have a blessed and successful school year.